Falling on His Grace

My husband told me the song "It's the End of the World as We Know It" is back on the charts. It seems appropriate as the world is changing, and there could be more changes ahead of us. At this time, there are both the familiar - in the seasons and outdoors, in the family we have gathered around us, and in the conveniences we have in our home - and the unfamiliar - restaurants, theaters, and some stores being closed, children home from school, keeping our distance from friends. And there's the unknown; there's navigating the unknown waters and new ill-understood and ill-defined social norms. Do I let my kids play with friends, limiting it to two or three total? Do we go to stores to buy essentials? Am I putting my family's and my life in danger by doing seemingly innocuous, everyday things? A friend made the comment that she feels as if the world is hanging on by a thread. This time we are in can certainly give that impression. For some, including her, this q...

“Oh, Lord, please make up for where I lack.”  How that prayer feels like a constant companion of mine through my days raising my five, children. It is a constant companion, especially, on those days when I struggle the most, whether with impatience, fatigue, or general irritability. It is a constant companion when I see how much I have to accomplish and how little of me there is to go around, when I feel as if I have bitten off more than I can chew. Motherhood has a way of bringing out our insufficiencies and making them known. We are imperfect human beings, in charge of raising children into competent and loving adults.  Yet, how can I teach them to be competent when I myself am not always so competent? How can I teach them to be loving when I act impatient and frustrated? Our faults surface too easily on some days and threaten to unravel all the good we have done and the patience we have shown with such painstaking effort. There are days when I am absolut...

I started Lent giving up complaining. Lately, I have had a greater tendency than usual to complain, whether with my words, with my actions, or with my simply moaping around and general impatience. I can't say giving up complaining is always easy, especially when the boys acted up during Mass on Sunday and completely zapped my energy... is that complaining? I hope not! Let's see... they were teaching me patience and love. And they also afforded me an excuse to go back to church to pray that afternoon, since I needed to let go of my frustration. Thank you, God, for difficult children! As you can see, this is not easy for me, but I am TRYING! But I gave Christ an inch in this, and when you give Him an inch... He'll make use of it! He is teaching me not only to not complain about my circumstances but to instead find JOY within them. He is teaching me not to look for the hassles and difficulties of my life but to instead look for the ways in which He is present in my li...

Andy began to look for work in the [small town] area. At first, we assumed he would be the one to work. I had always told him that if we were ever to move, I would stay home with our children. Andy looked but could not find work near [small town]. Maybe God is closing the door on this move, I thought. I had not even considered the idea that I may have to work. One week later, a letter came in the mail. As a physical therapist, I get almost daily mail seeking therapists to fill job openings. Usually, I look at them out of curiosity and then promptly discard them. But this one was different. This one was from a large, expanding Catholic organization in the Stevens Point area, calling therapists to “explore the back roads of your community” and to “bring strong Christian values and compassion to the people you serve.” It was a home health agency. “I could do this,” I told Andy, as I stood at the entrance of the living room, reading it over. ...

Giving it to God: How My Complete Surrender Gave Me the Freedom I Yearned For “Kim, you have to get home.” I had just come out of my counselor’s office and was sitting in my car, praying, when my phone rang. “Why? What’s going on?” I was concerned. The serious tone in my husband’s voice was obvious. “Everything’s caving in,” he explained. Both of us had been feeling depressed, crushed by the ins and outs of daily life, tired of the rush and hurry of our lives and the get-ahead mentality. Like many people, we needed to slow down. We were both working and raising two boys, ages 4 months and 20 months, and I was suffering with postpartum depression. City life was not for Andy, my husband of nearly three years, and he believed it wasn’t good for me either, that I would also feel better in a slower, less hurried environment. I rushed home. “We need to get out of here,” he said as I walked into the living room where he was ...

While I am not a writer or a theologian by training, I am a writer in that I love to write and rarely feel more alive than when I do write. And I am a theologian in that I love to study about God and to pray. I am one of those crazy people that learn the most through writing, especially when that writing is done in prayer and contemplation. And I feel that God has placed the desire to learn about Him and the desire to write on my heart. I hope that He will bless my efforts to praise Him through the use of the gifts He has given me and that He will help me to develop those gifts through their continued use so that I am able to give Him all the more glory. I am also not a counselor or a psychologist, but I do have some first hand knowledge of depression and anxiety and have learned much about both through experience. I have learned that depression and anxiety can be seen as an opportunity to fall on the grace of God, to learn to trust Him, and to allow ourselves to be drawn closer t...