Falling on His Grace

Sorry I have been so distant lately, not writing nor following. We have been busy - my husband with an 18 credit last semester, and me with working, and both with our boys. Then Andy's applying for jobs, followed by a time of transition. Yes, that's right: transition! Wonderful transition! To the very thing we have been working so hard for these last three or four years. Andy has found a job as a financial analyst, just 15 miles south of us, and I have just completed my first week at home! Andy is working at a foundry, in the office, helping with their internal accounting. Everyone seems to be great and helpful, and generally happy and friendly. With this new transition also, and with learning to be a stay-at-home mom, I'm wanting to start a new blog. I'm trying to start one on newhomemom.blogspot.com, titled "Adventures of a New-at-Home Mom." Hopefully it will be up and running soon. I am very excited to be starting my time at home. While I know being home is...

Some moments I think I'm getting better, less anxious. Other moments, I'm not so sure. It feels like forever that I've been feeling this way, when it really just started around Jan 15. Walking and praying are helping, as are the medications I've started taking (an anti anxiety and antidepressant, as well as sleep aid, which I really don't like). At least I don't feel like I want to crawl out of my skin or like the walls of my home are closing in on me, and my heart rate is typically staying below 100 now. And I'm sleeping most nights, with the help of the three medications. My work, upon seeing how badly I am doing, asked me to take 2 full weeks off, starting this week. And my husband also is having quite a bit of anxiety. He's got A LOT on his plate, and my anxiety as well as the way the kids are behaving is not helping him at all. I don't like to ask for prayers for myself, but PLEASE do offer up a prayer or two for all four of us, perhaps to Mary...

There's some improvement!! Yesterday, besides being a little tired and very slight anxiety, I really felt great! Last Wed, my Dr put my on Zoloft, which of course takes 2-4 weeks to work but does work on anxiety and depression. She also gave me a sleeping pill (which hadn't worked for me in the past either, but I thought I'd try it... possibly got more anxiety after using it? not sure). So the other doctor in the clinic talked to me Fri and gave me Lorazapam, to be used prn. I use it at night and have been able to sleep, which makes a world of difference then next day! The first day, I used one during the day, the second (yesterday) a 1/2, and today, I'm going to try to go without and maybe try a 1/2 tonight. But boy am I relieved. Still some anxiety that is situation-dependent, but not constant anymore. And I've been able to enjoy my kids and put up with their whining better. So thanks for all your prayers and well-wishes. I'm not out of the woods yet, so pleas...

January 3 0, 2011 Fourth Sunday in Ordinary Time From USCCB.org Reading 1 Zep 2:3; 3:12-13 Seek the LORD, all you humble of the earth, who have observed his law; seek justice, seek humility; perhaps you may be sheltered on the day of the LORD’s anger. But I will leave as a remnant in your midst a people humble and lowly, who shall take refuge in the name of the LORD: the remnant of Israel. They shall do no wrong and speak no lies; nor shall there be found in their mouths a deceitful tongue; they shall pasture and couch their flocks with none to disturb them. Ps 146:6-7, 8-9, 9-10 Responsorial Psalm R. (Mt 5:3) Blessed the poor in spirit; the kingdom of heaven is theirs! or: R. Alleluia. The LORD keeps faith forever, secures justice for the oppressed, gives food to the hungry. The LORD sets captives free. R. Blessed the poor in spirit; the kingdom of heaven is theirs! or: R. Alleluia. The LORD gives sight to the blind; the LORD raises up those who w...

I've had a difficult several months and have been through a range of emotions and am now left with pretty substantial anxiety and am beginning to feel depressed as well, perhaps because I've been dealing with all this just too long. I'm left with questions such as "does God want me to be suffering anxiety?" I'm learning to pray and rely on Him, though I have not done as well today, but could He have put this in my path so that I would rely on Him and strengthen my hope and reliance on Him? But today, I wonder if the devil is trying to use this to draw me away from God. I've been hesitating to say anything as I don't want you to feel sorry for me, but I do need some prayers please. Including that if God wants me to go on an antidepressant, that I will and that it will help quickly . But I also know that it is in suffering that Christ brings us closer to Him, and that closeness with Him increases our joy. And I pray that at the end of this, I will find m...

Four months until graduation!

January 23, 2011 Third Sunday in Ordinary Time Reading 1 Is 8:23-9:3-1 First the Lord degraded the land of Zebulun and the land of Naphtali; but in the end he has glorified the seaward road, the land west of the Jordan, the District of the Gentiles. Anguish has taken wing, dispelled is darkness: for there is no gloom where but now there was distress. The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light; upon those who dwelt in the land of gloom a light has shone. You have brought them abundant joy and great rejoicing, as they rejoice before you as at the harvest, as people make merry when dividing spoils. For the yoke that burdened them, the pole on their shoulder, and the rod of their taskmaster you have smashed, as on the day of Midian. Ps 27:1, 4, 13-14 Responsorial Psalm R. (1a) The Lord is my light and my salvation. The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom should I fear? The LORD is my life’s refuge; o...

January 9, 2011 The Feast of the Baptism of the Lord Reading 1 Is 42:1-4, 6-7 Thus says the LORD: Here is my servant whom I uphold, my chosen one with whom I am pleased, upon whom I have put my spirit; he shall bring forth justice to the nations, not crying out, not shouting, not making his voice heard in the street. a bruised reed he shall not break, and a smoldering wick he shall not quench, until he establishes justice on the earth; the coastlands will wait for his teaching. I, the LORD, have called you for the victory of justice, I have grasped you by the hand; I formed you, and set you as a covenant of the people, a light for the nations, to open the eyes of the blind, to bring out prisoners from confinement, and from the dungeon, those who live in darkness. Responsorial Psalm Ps 29:1-2, 3-4, 3, 9-10 R. (11b) The Lord will bless his people with peace. Give to the LORD, you sons of God, give to the LORD glory and praise, Give to the LORD...